Top Freakin' Chef

First, let me begin by saying in general, FUCK REALITY TELEVISION. I put it in all caps to the dismay of the font police because it's just that important.

Now, that said, let me tell you why I like Top Chef.

First, I like to cook. Yeah, I said it. I'm a heterosexual male who knows how to and enjoys to cook. In fact, I think it's almost a racial stereotype that black men know how to cook, but it's subverted since it's part of the heritage. (I'd like to stop for a second and mention this choice house I'm listening to. It's straight old school 90s sounds, except it dropped like last week. In fact, it's the A-Trak remix of a band I totally don't like: The Yeah Yeah Yeahs, namely 'Heads Will Roll', and I'm now going to start the Twitter abbreviation NIGO for 'need I go on?')
Now, because I like to cook, I want to learn how to do stuff I don't know how to do, especially if it's fancy as shit, and it tastes awesome, which is what Top Chef is all about

Second, I like to see the talent they get together. Unlike Hell's Kitchen, or whatever food show NBC's gonna cancel next, or whatever nonsense on Food Network, Top Chef actually has damned talented chefs. This past season, there were two James Beard nominated chefs, one who worked more or less directly for Eric Ripert, I mean it was nuts. The cooks in Hell's Kitchen are pretty much just that, cooks. And why is it they're ALWAYS serving a godsdamned WELLINGTON FOR SEVEN DAMNED SEASONS!!!!!

Third, the drama, while at the very least coached, is done pretty well. Yes, it's most definitely a show on Bravo, West Coast like a motherfucker, well represented in the GLBT crowd, let's call a spade a spade. Yes, it's a show on Bravo, West Coast like a motherfucker, sophisticated as hell, but pretentious as fuck, hoity-toity haute couture 'indie minded claptrap'. I get all that. But damn it, I can genuinely be about being stylish and 'classy just like these guys', while not spending a bajillion dollars in the process.

Fourth, the in house drama a la The Real (Bullshit) World is kept to a minimum. It's all about producing good food. You screw up once, you could be the hottest shit on the planet, they will tell you to pack your knives and get the fuck OUT

Lastly, the judging, though sometimes, okay, a lot of the time, vague as hell (like how everything is 'finished off' and everything is 'clean') is as fair as you're likely to see in reality competitions. To steal and modify a trope from TVTropes.Org, Anyone Can Be Eliminated